I would expect counsellors, child and youth care workers and doctors to be great listeners to be effective in their professions. People who listen for their profession are practicing these skills at work all the time. I believe listening is a skill that can be taught and that requires regular practice.
Depending on the situation I have probably engaged in most if not all the bad listening habits. When I am talking with a friend or family member, and I am really excited I can catch myself stage hogging. When I am tired or distracted, I tend to daydream or selectively listen to what is being said. Interestingly though, I have practiced the skill of ambushing when we were bargaining with the employer. There is a role on the bargaining team that is to listen and “gather ammunition” to be used during the bargaining process. Granted, this is not meant for a personal attack, merely a method to help with negotiations and in this situation one person is talking to a group of people, not one on one. When I asked a close friend who is also a colleague to evaluate me, they suggested I might “slip” periodically into debating, problem solving, rehearsing, and defensive listening. I found it interesting that someone else can identify your poor listening habits and wonder if some of them are subjective. For example, if someone is accusing you of making an error and you can provide evidence that contradicts, are you still being a defensive listener? Upon reading some articles that provide solutions to correct poor listening skills I think you need to watch your body language, ask clarifying questions, or repeat what was said to try and understand the other person’s viewpoint and then provide your response. Here's a couple of sites that identify poor listening habits and suggestions to improve: 6 Bad Listening Habits You Probably Have and How To Crush Them (goodlisteningskills.org) Not Listening? Here's How to Recover and Repair | Psychology Today
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AuthorTanya Kerr is a current student of Queen's University Graduate studies. ArchivesCategories |